The first time someone said this to me, I thought it was romantic. I was nineteen and stupid and I heard "no one will love you more than me" and my heart did that thing where it flutters and you feel chosen and special and seen.

What I didn't hear was the threat.

Because that's what…

We've been taught that the only relationship worth having is one that lasts until death. That anything less is failure. That commitment means promising forever, regardless of whether that forever still makes sense.

But what if the forever obsession is actually destroying the relationships we have?

You know what's wild? We can spot red flags in other people's relationships from a mile away.

Your friend tells you her new boyfriend checks her phone constantly and you immediately think, "That's controlling." Your coworker mentions his girlfriend gets angry when he spends time with friends and you know instantly, "That's isolating."

But when it's happening to us? Suddenly we're blind.

Most of us didn't learn about love from experience. We learned it from a screen.